A “Police State” with a Side of Subway Sandwiches
If you’ve recently strolled past the Washington Monument and thought, “Hmm, the National Guard really adds to the skyline,” congratulations — you’ve officially entered Donald Trump’s new reality show, Law & Order: Presidential Edition. Federal police, National Guard troops, Customs and Border Patrol agents, and FBI in full tactical gear have been stationed around D.C. — allegedly to “fight crime” but in practice to flex some authoritarian muscle.
And no, this isn’t Gotham City. Unless Gotham had a $5 footlong from Subway parked out front.
Thirty Days to Absolute Power… or So He Hopes
Here’s the civics-class refresher: A president can only deploy this kind of force for 30 days without Congress signing off. Here’s the Trump refresher: He’s already hinting he’ll just call it a “national emergency” and keep the troops in place indefinitely. And, judging by the Republican majority’s inability to even locate their “checks and balances” handbook, he’s probably right. The Constitution? More like a suggestion box at this point.
The Crime Rate is Down — But the Drama is Up
Local D.C. residents aren’t exactly living in a crime thriller. Several have gone on record saying the city feels safer than it has in years. No gunshots. No break-ins. Yet Trump’s painting a picture of urban chaos that apparently only a personal army can fix. Reverend Al Sharpton points out that Trump’s list of “troubled cities” all happen to have Black mayors, which is subtle in the way a chainsaw is subtle.
Meanwhile, the same man who let January 6 rioters run wild and later pardoned them is now pretending to be the ultimate law-and-order savior. Irony died. Again.
Federal Stop-and-Frisk: Now with More ICE
Critics are calling the D.C. operation “federal stop-and-frisk,” and videos have already emerged of ICE detaining people at newly installed checkpoints — surprise, surprise, in predominantly Black and Brown neighborhoods. Fox News voices like Jeanine Pirro openly dismiss the idea of addressing the root causes of crime, because rehabilitation apparently cuts into valuable “punishment photo-op” time.
Culture Wars: Trump Eyes the Kennedy Center Honors
Because militarizing a city isn’t enough, Trump is also muscling into America’s arts scene. Never having received a Kennedy Center Honor himself (shocking, truly), he’s now taken over the event — personally vetting and rejecting honorees. In his own words: “Maybe I’ll honor Trump next year.” That’s right — he’s giving himself awards now. Next up: Best Actor in a Role He’s Completely Made Up.
Cultural figures like Shonda Rhimes have already pulled out in protest, but expect the red carpet to be replaced with MAGA merch tables and the orchestra to open with a stirring rendition of “YMCA.”
What This Really Is — and Why It’s Not About Safety
Strip away the PR spin, and this isn’t about making cities safer. It’s about controlling the narrative, distracting from scandals (yes, the Epstein ones too), and framing urban, Black-led cities as crime-infested danger zones in need of a white-knight intervention. It’s an old political playbook dressed up in camo and sunglasses.
D.C. residents, however, aren’t buying it. Many see it for what it is — a power grab in the nation’s capital, with a side of cultural colonization. The only real “emergency” here is how many democratic norms one man can bulldoze in a single term.
